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just adopt already

January 27, 2009

http://roomfordebate.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/01/27/eight-is-enough/?8dpc

I don’t get it.  There are unwanted children all over the world.  Why oh why do people undergo fertility treatments?  If you can have children naturally, then fine, go do it.  If you can’t consider accepting one who is looking for a "forever home" .  Why go through the expensive medical operations which too often result in heartbreak and no children, and then occasionally swing so far to the other direction as to result in eight children?

Also, to the guy who says "reduction is not abortion", wtf?  Granted, I think if you have eight fetuses, you ought to consider reduction, because it’s likely to result in better health for all concerned.  Still, it is abortion.

FYI, dear readers.  I’m going to a conference, and after that will return to a normal working schedule.  I’ll be shutting up a lot more and not bothering you with so excessively many opinionated ljs.

EDIT: I know commenting on this makes me a hopelessly opinionated bitch.  I do apologize.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. January 28, 2009 7:59 am

    So before meeting Nathan I debated about this all the time. Nathan wants his own biological kids if possible so that ended the internal debate. Before though I sorta felt like I should want to have my own kids but felt terrible about all the orphans. Plus I know my family history and I’m probably fairly infertile. So here’s all the reasons against adopting that I’ve come up with, although there is alot for it as well I’m playing devils advocate here.
    So theres some crazy ass women who actually want to be pregnant. So for them adoption doesn’t achieve that lol. My mom was one of these bizarre people and she was actually really sick (morning sickness during both of her pregnancies). She says she still gets a twinge of jealousy when she sees pregnant people. With all these people who think this maybe, just maybe, being pregnant is something that as one thing I can do that boys can’t I should try. (She went as far with the fertility treatments as some meds to get pregnant and some meds to hold the pregnancy and that was it. The next step was the drug that causes these 8 babies in one pop and they said we’ll adopt before trying that mess)
    There are horror stories of adoptions gone bad (adoption agencies lying about fetal alcohol syndrome babies ect….) although I personally think you take on some of those genetic risks by having your own too.
    Also there isn’t enough babies (like newborn to under three years) to go around. So you end up having to get a mother to “pick” you out of a bunch of applications. Or you run the risk of getting an older child who has had lots of emotional trama and might not be able to get past it.
    And finally the red tape is sorta absurd. After years of applications and money spent they can refuse you for being gay, for being fat, for being single, not having a job, having a job where you work to much and any other thing they decide makes you unable to get a kid that needs help. But no one can stop you from your god given right to reproduce (catch the sarcasm). So either way you go you run the risk of not getting a child after spending tons of money trying. With the same risk and money the draw of having your own child could win.
    Again not saying this is right or wrong (because your EDIT confuses me and I don’t want you to think I’m implying that lol) But its the things I’ve come up with after years of thinking about it.

  2. January 28, 2009 3:39 pm

    *laughs* the point of the edit was supposed to be that I know it’s presumptuous of me to comment on the issue, but I’ve gone and done it anyway, so I apologize for being a bitch.
    As for your post, the one comment I’ll make (I’m supposed to be getting ready for the conference) is that when I say that everyone should adopt, I mean you ought to go for older children at least some of the time. My commitment to wanting adopted kids came in high school when I met a guy in foster care. Lemme tell you, any issues he has today were caused mostly by that awful system. So I’d vote that parents adopt some older kids, and do their best to deal with the issues that come with older kids.

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