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An end of year entry

December 29, 2007

More will come, I’m sure, but tonight I had a lot of thoughts swirling about friendship and wanted to post some thoughts about this past year.  Of course, the computer is a horrid place to think, so I did what we in my gtbooks class learned is a shackled free write.  This was written to the tune of Dave Matthews Band.

Friends.  I think that’s the lesson of this year.  Making them, losing them, keeping them.  Learning that some people are just assholes.  And sometimes things don’t work out.  But also finding new wonderful depths and textures to the good friendships.  I’ve found doubt in large measure, and great frustrations.  For the first time I can say I’ve been a right bitch to some people, and undeserving of their time.  Also had people treat me that way.  But I’ve found new friends, who are fascinatingly surprising in their good qualities.  I’m learning to love the complications of people, as well as to some measure learning to ignore them.  Many of my new friends are so different I can’t believe we’re friends.  And yet it works.
Before I move on to close friends, a side note about love.  I’ve had three very different relationships in the past year.  One was more serious than I wanted or cared to deal with at the time.  One never happened, and has turned into a great regret.  One was a drunk mistake repeated all summer which I regret only because somehow through it I lost a friend who I think I could have really been close to.  Not surprisingly these three make me happy I’m single.  It’s simple.  Not that I’m not looking or anything, but it’s nice to be simple.
And then there’s close friends.  I see Katie and Yin tomorrow.  I can’t wait.  It’s been so long since I’ve seen them that I don’t even know what to think.  How the hell did we let it be so long?  Those two, and Sara, and Nate, this last year has been golden.  I’ve had such a wonderful time.  Graduation, what an amazing moment.  You know, part of the reason I have my degree framed and ready to hang on the wall is because of my friends.  Most of the reason actually.  Through four years we did everything.  Laughed, cried, lost it, found happiness.  I never want to forget that, and that’s the lasting impression of undergrad.  Not chemistry, but friendship.

More sap soon to come, I’m sure.  Love y’all.

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One Comment leave one →
  1. January 1, 2008 5:56 am

    I think you do most of your best writing to DMB. <3

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