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Boys, question

October 30, 2007

Friend online said this. Do you agree?
“It’s a real minefield growing up male in the US, at least it used to be. Hopefully things are improving for the younguns but way back when if you were “different” you caught hell for it. The slightest breach of expectation got you labelled, shunned and probably beat up. Learning quickly to cover up and blend in were necessities. Is it really a surprise that some “protesteth too much”?”

5 Comments leave one →
  1. October 30, 2007 11:49 pm

    That’s just how it goes.
    I was “queer boy” since 7th grade.
    It stopped around 11th grade, maybe 10th.
    And a little different is an issue. Extremely different is. But not even just extremely different. Extremely different by choice is where you run into problems.
    Adam Deline (I think that was the one) had problems because he was goth. Not because he was gay.
    I’ve heard stories about gay kids being picked on for being gay, but never really seen it.
    And everyone is labeled. Even the popular kids were labeled. There were sluts, and stoners, and jocks, and preps, and cheerleaders, what have you.
    I don’t think I was labeled because I was gay. I think I was quite accepted. I was very comfortable with my high school experience. (Not middle school though.)

  2. October 30, 2007 11:50 pm

    I meant “a little different isn’t an issue. Extremely different is.”

  3. October 31, 2007 12:37 am

    I’m not a boy, but I don’t remember seeing it that bad in schools growing up.
    The way my DAD tells it though is quite different. He would completely agree with that statement. He says things like that all the time, and concurs that today it is not nearly as bad.

  4. Anonymous permalink
    October 31, 2007 6:37 pm

    I definitely agree with this. Boys have much more limited roles they are allowed to experiment with. They are limited by fear of bullying and lack of encouragement by their parents and/or teachers for participation in anything other than sports.
    Girls are allowed more freedom, to participate in either sports or the arts and to dress in either masculine or feminine ways. I grew up with a “Tomboy” sister who played sports and wore boyish clothes. Being called “Tomboy” is more acceptable than being called a sissy for participating in the arts as a boy. As a sissy there is a real risk of both psychological and physical harm.
    I’m not arguing that girls always have it easier; they eventually get punished when they are older if they do not conform to certain gender stereotypes. However, boys experience this even earlier which has a lot of emotional consequences later. This could be one factor contributing to why men commit the majority of crimes across the board.

  5. November 1, 2007 1:54 am

    Yeah. Generally. Maybe not as severe, but I was (and still am) quite the odd duckling. And I did catch a lot of hell for it. Went on until 9th grade when I A) Joined the football team and…probably more importantly B) Threw one of my more fiendish bullies down a flight of stairs.
    After that, everyone seemed to just back off.

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